Puns are undeniably cheesy at times, but sharing funny puns almost always leads to a good laugh—and in this day and time, we could all use more of that right now. These best funny puns are everything: bad funny puns, hilarious funny puns, funny puns for friends to get a good laugh!
Why did Adele cross the road? To say hello from the other side.
What kind of concert only costs 45 cents? A 50 Cent concert featuring Nickelback.
What did the grape say when it got crushed? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
I want to be cremated as it is my last hope for a smoking hot body.
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
To the guy who invented zero, thanks for nothing.
I had a crazy dream last night! I was swimming in an ocean of orange soda. Turns out it was just a Fanta sea.
A crazy wife says to her husband that moose are falling from the sky. The husband says, it’s reindeer.
Ladies, if he can’t appreciate your fruit jokes, you need to let that mango.
Geology rocks but Geography is where it’s at!
What was Forrest Gump’s email password? 1forrest1
Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? I heard the food was good but it had no atmosphere.
Can February March? No, but April May.
Need an ark to save two of every animal? I noah guy.
I don’t trust stairs because they’re always up to something.
Smaller babies may be delivered by stork but the heavier ones need a crane.
My grandpa has the heart of the lion and a lifetime ban from the zoo.
Why was Dumbo sad? He felt irrelephant.
A man sued an airline company after it lost his luggage. Sadly, he lost his case.
I lost my mood ring and I don’t know how to feel about it!
Yesterday, I accidentally swallowed some food coloring. The doctor says I’m okay, but I feel like I’ve dyed a little inside.
So what if I don’t know what apocalypse means? It’s not the end of the world!
My friend drove his expensive car into a tree and found out how his Mercedes bends.
Becoming a vegetarian is one big missed steak.
I was wondering why the ball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
Some aquatic mammals at the zoo escaped. It was otter chaos!
Never trust an atom, they make up everything!
Waking up this morning was an eye-opening experience.
Long fairy tales have a tendency to dragon.
Hilarious Funny Puns
I’m no cheetah…you’re lion!
Three conspiracy theorists walk into a bar…You can’t tell me that’s just a coincidence!
Never date someone cross-eyed… You’ll always catch them seeing other people on the side!
What did the mayonnaise say when somebody opened the refrigerator? “Hey, close the door! I’m dressing!”
Time flies like an arrow… Fruit flies like a banana!
How do you make a good egg-roll? You push it down a hill!
Apple is designing a new automatic car. But they’re having trouble installing Windows!
That baseball player was such a bad sport. He stole third base and then just went home!
I’ve started sleeping in our fireplace. Now I sleep like a log!
I have a few jokes about unemployed people… But none of them work!
Every soccer player’s favorite beverage? Penal-tea!
Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? It’s okay. He woke up!
What do you call an overweight psychic? A four-chin teller!
I used to wonder why Frisbees looked bigger the closer they came… And then it hit me!
Two egotists started a fight. It was an I for an I!
I’m glad I know sign language. It can come in pretty handy!
Looks tasty. Gimme a pizza that.
Cactus puns are simply succulent.
I became a vegetarian. Huge missed-steak!
What should you call an average potato? A commen-tator!
I saw an ad for burial plots, and I thought… “That’s the last thing I need!”
I can’t believe I got fired from the calendar factory. All I did was take a day off!
A cross eyed teacher couldn’t control his pupils.
After the accident, the juggler didn’t have the balls to do it.
I used to be afraid of hurdles, but I got over it.
To write with a broken pencil is pointless.
I read a book on anti-gravity. I couldn’t put it down.
I couldn’t remember how to throw a boomerang but it came back to me.
Funny Puns For Friend
She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.
A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class, because it was a weapon of math disruption.
No matter how hard you push the envelope, it’s still stationery.
A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.
A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.
Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.
A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
The midget fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.
The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
A backward poet writes inverse.
In a democracy, it’s your vote that counts. In feudalism, it’s your Count that votes.
The quickest way to get someone’s attention is to no longer want it.
An intellectual says a simple thing in a hard way. An artist says a hard thing in a simple way.
Nothing haunts us like the things we don’t say.
Funny Puns To Make Someone Laugh
How do you throw a space party? You planet.
How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.
Nope. Unintended.
The shovel was a ground breaking invention, but everyone was blow away by the leaf blower.
A scarecrow says, “This job isn’t for everyone, but hay, it’s in my jeans.”
A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says “Make me one with everything.”
Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body? He’s alright now.
What do you call a girl with one leg that’s shorter than the other? Ilene.
The broom swept the nation away.
I did a theatrical performance on puns. It was a play on words.
What does a clock do when it’s hungry? It goes back for seconds.
What do you do with a dead chemist? You barium.
I bet the person who created the door knocker won a Nobel prize.
Towels can’t tell jokes. They have a dry sense of humor.
Two birds are sitting on a perch and one says “Do you smell fish?”
Did you hear about the cheese factory that exploded in france? There was nothing but des brie.
Do you know sign language? You should learn it, it’s pretty handy.
What do you call a beautiful pumpkin? GOURDgeous.
Why did one banana spy on the other? Because she was appealing.
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.
What do you call a cow with all of its legs? High steaks.
About Tokyo Chan
Tokyo Chan is a creative writer who enjoys writing captions for Instagram and inspiration quotes. She received her bachelor of art degree in English from San Jose State University, California. Tokyo aspires to be a published author and motivational speaker. She loves spending time with her family and friends, traveling, and exploring new cultures.
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